BABY????

 We will be welcoming baby # 5 in September!! These products will soon be returning to our home. We had our 12 week appointment on a Thursday so we sent the kids to the basement while we prepared "an early dinner" and I decorated. We called the kids up and the looks on their faces were priceless. Makayla and Maggie read the plates aloud and Makayla had tears start in her eyes. I heard a gasp of "mom!" from her and Maggie simply ran over to me and just hugged me as tight as she could for a long while! PJ started jumping and was super excited. He immediately wished for a brother, then his next line was: "I wish your belly was big enough that we could feel the baby move now!" He since has been found just walking around with the ultrasound pictures and when asked what he is doing he replies: "I am just looking at my baby." Gabriella has been the most reserved reaction of them. She has been quiet and not offering much when we talk. I asked her recently if she was happy we were having a baby and she shrugged. I then reminded her she is the one who wanted a baby, to which she said: " I wanted a baby Elsa that I could play with, not a real one!". oops.... I have been talking a lot more with her lately and she is coming around. I have no worries because she totally LOVES babies, I think it is more we just are not making visible arrangements for her to see the reality of this.  She is however the only one wanting a girl...

This is how the kids have been since I found out about being pregnant. Extra snuggles with me instead of their dad. This picture is  one I will treasure. 

So what changed....a year ago I was totally done having kids. I was very happy with our 4, we were the six pack. Everyone is healthy, we are becoming more independent and life is getting a lot easier. I got a call from a dear friend last summer saying she was expecting. I immediately thought oh God I am glad it is not me and good luck to you. In hindsight not a very polite thought. A baby is always a wonderful gift. Pete has never given up wanting another child. I think the back to back pregnancies and babies with PJ and Brie that I was just done, plus I like even numbers. So I started rethinking my reaction to my friend. Then Pete and I went on a retreat weekend in the fall. It was a lot of time spent talking and listening. I vowed to really listen to him and his request for another child. I also promised myself to listen to God and his desires for me, and us as a family. The signs that followed that weekend were enormous. From friends and families comments, to billboards of newborns, and weekend preaching about being open to God's plan and creation.  Looking at the calendar nine months ahead we decided we would see what happens starting in December. I simply prayed whatever was God's will may it be done. Well with a positive pregnancy test on Jan. 4th, I had a pretty good idea of what God wanted. Pete and I have always joked about having a "tag-a-long" since being friends in high school many years ago.  From that positive test till we told the kids on March 12th I/we have only had optimistic and wonderful feelings about how this is going to impact our family. The life experiences this is going to give our kids is just priceless. Since telling the kids they have just amazed me. The comments, the desires and the overwhelming love they already show is just something that cannot be described.  

So while this was not my desire 12 months ago, not even on my radar, I could not be more happy and excited for my family and for this little person inside! if love makes babies grow we could be having a really LARGE baby! 

I was quite nervous to tell the world not knowing how they would react because we are "old" and we already have such a "large family", but this pregnancy has been so well received by all that I am overjoyed.

If I and the doctor have our way we will not be finding out the gender until delivery. Having been a labor and delivery nurse before I have been in rooms with parents who did not know. It is such a neat moment, I think it would be fun to experience it personally. We knew with the other 4 so why not try something different this time. Pete however really wants to know so we will see......

I am officially due September 13 so likely we will not deliver any later than Sept 6th due to some medical history.  I am hoping for at least a September birthday.  For now we say prayers every night for a healthy baby and momma, then if we can ask a favor we put in a plug for PJ to get a brother. :~)

more than you ever wanted to know but the whole story so that I may always remember......